This video struck me as quite funny, though I must say odd as well. Strangely, the parents in this community seemed to not only find this incident humorous, but basically admitted to their own personal use of the wacky tobaccy. I mean it's about time parental units wise up and start telling the truth about the ol' ganj. I figured though it probably had something to do with all the fragile weirdo hippies who live in California. So I moved on in my reading, but next I came across this article:
Teacher accused of sex with student
Synopsis: The article describes a San Jose man who is in custody Friday for allegedly having a sexual relationship with a female student who attends a high school where he used to work as a student teacher. Nice one. This theme seems to be a popping up all over the news lately. I still haven't been able to make the connection with why people pity students who screw their teachers. Take a look through some Internet porn sites. I'm sure you'll see that sleeping with a teacher is a pretty popular fantasy. Oh and lets not forget that high school teenagers are probably 90% of the people looking at porn on the web. So as far as I'm concerned we can give the "poor innocent" kid a cigar and call it sex ed. Either way San Jose is all of a sudden is turning out to be a hot spot for news stories. My adventure continued:
Paperboy arrested on suspicion of selling marijuana
Synopsis: Paperboy, a former Grammy nominated hip-hop star, was arrested in S.J. on suspicion of selling marijuana. What a surprise...a hip-hop star who makes bad decisions. The two go together like shit and stink. But wait, it doesn't stop there:
Officials: Sex may have been part of cash-for-grades scheme in East Bay
Synopsis: Dozens of students in the S.J. area, including several who transferred to four-year colleges and universities, are suspected of paying up to $600 or offering sex to records-office employees for each improved grade. The college first suspected 84 students, but now say they have cleared at least 20 from the original list.
At this point I had to stop and reflect. San Jose may be the coolest place in the world to live. In what other city can an 11-year old middle school student buy his dime bags from a Grammy nominated hip-hop star? But wait lets not stop there. They can then bake them into pastries with Mom's help and approval, take them to school, and feed them to fellow students and teachers. It sure makes four square more fun! Don't worry about any correlation between drug use and falling grades either Sonny. You can always slip Teach a few Benjamin's and then fuck her too, she'll take care of the report card.
All of this information really had me thinking. I might even come back from Israel to live in sunny San Jose. But it was only a matter of time before I came to the final article which reversed any possibility of me moving there:
Squirrel attacks two parents, student in S.J.
Synopsis: An 11-year-old student and two parents at Evergreen Elementary School got a scare this morning when a squirrel ran into the building and attacked them, drawing blood in two cases, school officials said.
These squirrel attacks are really getting out of hand man. I mean I must say I am quite alarmed at the increasing amount of squirrel attacks I'm reading about lately (see second blog entry) Thank G-d there aren't squirrels in this country. Knowing the San Jose area though, the squirrel was probably all hyped up on meth and Red Bull. Oh well, I guess I'll have to find a different city in which to smoke my drugs and do my teachers.
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